Well at least one part of my future is clear. Today, I finally saw this-- Decision: Congratulations, you've been admitted! I mean yeah, it is not the BFP I have hoped to see over the years, but it is still exciting! So in January I will be taking classes and working towards becoming a math and science teacher to 4th-8th graders! I am excited about this, and it gives my life a concrete goal/plan.
Since dealing with infertility, the future is so unclear. Will I be pregnant next year? Will we have a baby next year? The year after? Ever?
I have accepted the fact that I need to have goals and a plan and some of it needs to be within my control. So taking classes and working towards another career is just the ticket! New hope, new possibilities. I have always wanted to become a teacher and especially once we have children. I was a substitute teacher briefly and really enjoyed it! Also, it will be nice to have a career where I will have the same schedule as our child(ren).
It feels good to have a decision about something. Something concrete. I needed this! I feel like I can be more patient with fertility treatments now that I have something else major I am working towards. Does anyone else feel like this? Like they need to work towards something they actually have control over while dealing with infertility? If anything, just to maintain sanity?